One of the things that really bugged me about the church that I learned in these weeks leading up to something called stake conference was that I didn't get visiting teachers. I thought this was crap. I mean I really wanted to girls to come over and visit me and it would be even better if it could have been Sheena since I was her home teacher. But alas I learned much to my dismay that guys don't get visiting teachers. Go figure.
Well about a two weeks before stake conference President Clark called me into his office again. "JD, would you do something for me?" he asked. "Sure President Clark, what do you need?" "Well we would like you to give a talk at stake conference." At this time in my life I really didn't realize how big a thing stake conference was and if you remember I was the same guy who thought a stake dinner was really a steak dinner and was pretty upset to find only casseroles and jello when I hadn't ate all day in preparation for an awesome dinner. I told President Clark "Sure, no problem." I only thought it would be a lot like sacrament meeting with maybe a few more people. I then pulled out my trusty five star notebook that I still wrote down questions in and asked my newest questions from my reading to President Clark. Only this time he did something a little different than just give me the answer or show me where to find it or discuss it with me. He showed me something that was called the index that sat in the middle of my standard works. He showed me how I could find all the scriptures that related to a topic and learn for myself what the Lord had said. So we opened up to the subject of one of my questions and lo and behold right there on that page was my answer. It was the sixth or seventh verse listed under that topic but it answered my question.
President Clark had given me a whole new world of discovery and innovation that led me learn more than I ever thought possible. I truly started to learn precept upon precept and line upon line.
However as Stake Conference loomed closer I was presented with a feeling of gloom and despair. I didn't know if I really wanted to talk at conference I was scared and wondered if I would mess up and if everyone would make fun of me or even worse if I really messed up and they told me I couldn't come back to church ever.
I called Bishop Donaldson one night and asked him if he could meet with me because I had some things I needed to talk about. We set a meeting for later on that night around nine or ten.
Bishop Donaldson truly is an amazing man. He helped me overcome obsticles and wade through tribulation. I am truly greatful that he was there for me to help me in my times of need and with Stake Confrence just around the corner I needed his help.
I arrived at Bishop Donaldson office at the old institute building about ten minutes early so I sat down outside his office and waited. Finally after what seemed like an eternity Bishop D finished with whoever was in his office and they came out and he invited me in.
"What can I do for you JD?" Bishop D asked. I looked up at him and said, "I'm scared. I really don't know what to do about talking at stake confrence. I want to say the right things Bishop and I don't want to get in trouble by saying the wrong things." "What do you mean by wrong things JD?" "Well . . . I don't want to say something thats wrong and get kicked out of the church or to say something wrong and make someone mad." (you have to remember that the first time I bore my testimony I called Jesus Christ a stud and Joseph Smith a freaking awesome guy) He looked at me as only a Bishop can and with loving eyes that bespoke that everything would be allright he said, "JD, if you will speak from your heart and listen to the Holy Ghost you will have nothing to worry about." "Bishop, I just don't want to sound dumb or stupid either. There are just so many people who know so much more than I do and can do a better job at this then me." He told me there was not a thing for me to worry about and that if I listened to the Holy Ghost and studied my scriptures I would know what to say and how to say it. I was still afraid but I felt that what Bishop had told me to do was right.
I left Bishop D's office and started to walk home thinking about what to say. I was still scared but it was no longer an overwhelming feeling. When I got back to my apartment and sat down in my bedroom and opened up my scriptures and started to study.
As confrence weekend finnaly arrived I felt as if a burden had been lifted from my shoulders and I looked forward to confrence even though I had only been baptized about a month or so now.
Showing posts with label Marine Corps. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Marine Corps. Show all posts
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Why I served a Mormon Mission part II
As it got into about mid November and I decided that after blessing the sacrament for a few weeks now I pretty much understood what this priesthood thing was about I decided I needed to go to the temple. During my trip in October to General Conference we had walked around temple square and I had often heard people talk about how wonderful and great the temple was. Most of the LDS people I knew said they wanted to get married in the temple or had been married in the Temple. When I was up at temple square I was informed that I couldn't enter the temple unless I was a member of the Church.
Well guess what? Now I was a member of the church and very much planned on entering the temple to see what was so great about it and why it had to be kept a secret from the rest of the world. So I went to my good friend Bishop Donaldson and asked him if I could a recommend(that's what I was told I had to get to be allowed inside the temple) to go to the temple. He then told me that I couldn't go to the temple until I had been a member a year. This upset me pretty bad. I asked Bishop why I couldn't go... I was a member now and had been baptized and made clean wasn't I worthy enough to enter the temple. Bishop Donaldson told me that it was church policy that new converts had to wait a year to enter the temple. Well that just didn't cut it for me as far as an explanation went. However Bishop Donaldson being the inspired and wonderful man that he is then mention to me why I might not be able to go to every part of the temple right now there was something that I could do.
Guess what... that night I received my first temple recommend so that I could go and do baptisms for the dead.( I was happy and relieved to know that we weren't going to go and dig up graves so that we could baptise people but I still wondered how the whole thing worked.) That weekend I went up to Vernal to meet more of Sheena's family I had met her Father, Mother, and two of her sisters at the Miss Carbon Pageant but there were still some brothers and sisters I hadn't met. But what I was really looking forward to was the opportunity to go to the Vernal Temple.
When we arrived at the Vernal temple we went to a door that seemed to lead down to the basement. However when we opened the door I saw a medium sized shelf with many pairs of shoes on it. The elderly gentlemen then asked me to take off my shoes because I was standing on holy ground. I quickly took off my shoes and put them with the others and went into the rest of the temple following the cute old man.
Participating in the saving ordinances for those who didn't have the chance to be baptized in this life or to receive the Holy Ghost is one of the most amazing experiences a person can have in this life. To know that you are helping a fellow brother or sister do something that they didn't have the opportunity to receive is wonderful. It made sense to me then and now that if God requires that men be baptized to enter into the Kingdom of God what happens to those who never get baptized or those who don't even get to learn about Christ. It didn't seem like a loving or merciful God in Heaven who would damn over half his children when they didn't even get a fair swing at being a part of his kingdom. So baptisms for the dead made sense to me as it provided those who didn't get to be baptized in this life and opportunity to get it done in the next.
Going into the temple of the Lord is like floating above the ground. It is a place where the cares of the world simply washed away from me as I entered onto that holy ground. When I feel the spirit strongly I can't help but smile and throughout my time doing baptisms there in the Vernal temple I couldn't stop smiling and being filled with joy. It truly was a house of God and I am glad that I went to it so soon.
Going to the temple helped me to understand more of what the Gospel was about and why somethings that happen in the temple are so sacred and wonderful that it almost makes them somehow less special to talk about them outside of those holy walls.
After going to the temple my desire to go was somewhat lessened because I had felt why the temple was important and amazing. If you can't tell by now I like to experience the gospel first hand and don't like taking someone else's word for how amazing something is when I can learn for myself why it is so wonderful.
In early December as we prepared for final exams I decided that I really needed to have the Melkzidech Priesthood. I felt like the gospel was something to sucked up and once I had sucked up everything that I had I simply wanted more. I had developed an appetite for gospel knowledge that was unwavering. It seemed the more I learned and gained the more I desired. As I learned line upon line I only wanted to have more lines. I didn't want this light and truth to suddenly dry up without me getting all that I could. The more I learned about the temple the more often I wanted to go and do baptisms. When I was informed one day at the temple that I didn't have the right priesthood to perform ordinances in the temple I made it a personal mission to obtain that priesthood so that I might more fully understand the temple and it blessings.
Well guess what? Now I was a member of the church and very much planned on entering the temple to see what was so great about it and why it had to be kept a secret from the rest of the world. So I went to my good friend Bishop Donaldson and asked him if I could a recommend(that's what I was told I had to get to be allowed inside the temple) to go to the temple. He then told me that I couldn't go to the temple until I had been a member a year. This upset me pretty bad. I asked Bishop why I couldn't go... I was a member now and had been baptized and made clean wasn't I worthy enough to enter the temple. Bishop Donaldson told me that it was church policy that new converts had to wait a year to enter the temple. Well that just didn't cut it for me as far as an explanation went. However Bishop Donaldson being the inspired and wonderful man that he is then mention to me why I might not be able to go to every part of the temple right now there was something that I could do.
Guess what... that night I received my first temple recommend so that I could go and do baptisms for the dead.( I was happy and relieved to know that we weren't going to go and dig up graves so that we could baptise people but I still wondered how the whole thing worked.) That weekend I went up to Vernal to meet more of Sheena's family I had met her Father, Mother, and two of her sisters at the Miss Carbon Pageant but there were still some brothers and sisters I hadn't met. But what I was really looking forward to was the opportunity to go to the Vernal Temple.
When we arrived at the Vernal temple we went to a door that seemed to lead down to the basement. However when we opened the door I saw a medium sized shelf with many pairs of shoes on it. The elderly gentlemen then asked me to take off my shoes because I was standing on holy ground. I quickly took off my shoes and put them with the others and went into the rest of the temple following the cute old man.
Participating in the saving ordinances for those who didn't have the chance to be baptized in this life or to receive the Holy Ghost is one of the most amazing experiences a person can have in this life. To know that you are helping a fellow brother or sister do something that they didn't have the opportunity to receive is wonderful. It made sense to me then and now that if God requires that men be baptized to enter into the Kingdom of God what happens to those who never get baptized or those who don't even get to learn about Christ. It didn't seem like a loving or merciful God in Heaven who would damn over half his children when they didn't even get a fair swing at being a part of his kingdom. So baptisms for the dead made sense to me as it provided those who didn't get to be baptized in this life and opportunity to get it done in the next.
Going into the temple of the Lord is like floating above the ground. It is a place where the cares of the world simply washed away from me as I entered onto that holy ground. When I feel the spirit strongly I can't help but smile and throughout my time doing baptisms there in the Vernal temple I couldn't stop smiling and being filled with joy. It truly was a house of God and I am glad that I went to it so soon.
Going to the temple helped me to understand more of what the Gospel was about and why somethings that happen in the temple are so sacred and wonderful that it almost makes them somehow less special to talk about them outside of those holy walls.
After going to the temple my desire to go was somewhat lessened because I had felt why the temple was important and amazing. If you can't tell by now I like to experience the gospel first hand and don't like taking someone else's word for how amazing something is when I can learn for myself why it is so wonderful.
In early December as we prepared for final exams I decided that I really needed to have the Melkzidech Priesthood. I felt like the gospel was something to sucked up and once I had sucked up everything that I had I simply wanted more. I had developed an appetite for gospel knowledge that was unwavering. It seemed the more I learned and gained the more I desired. As I learned line upon line I only wanted to have more lines. I didn't want this light and truth to suddenly dry up without me getting all that I could. The more I learned about the temple the more often I wanted to go and do baptisms. When I was informed one day at the temple that I didn't have the right priesthood to perform ordinances in the temple I made it a personal mission to obtain that priesthood so that I might more fully understand the temple and it blessings.
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Why I served a mission Part 1
When I was baptized at twenty years old, the man who baptized me asked me if I had thought about serving a mission as we got dressed in the dressing room. I told him that I wasn't planning on serving a mission and had other plans. I had already enlisted in the United States Marine Corps and that was where I planned to serve any kind of mission. When I was received the gift of the Holy Ghost I was blessed to serve a mission and I thought I was being coerced into it with the priesthood and that pushed me even further away from it.
It seems at times when we are pushed towards doing something that we become as stubborn as mules but when we decide something on our own that almost nothing can dissuade us from following our new course and so it was with me.
About a week after I was baptized I decided that I needed to have the Arronic Priesthood. So I asked Bishop D what I needed to do to get it and he said come to church, be active, and worthy. "Well," I responded, "I am doing all those things, so when can I get it." So two weeks after I was baptized I received the Arronic Priesthood from Trevor Alvold.( I think his names spelled wrong there) I then had the opportunity to pass, prepare, and bless the sacrament along with the obligation to start something called Home Teaching. The Sunday after I received the Arronic Priesthood I was called upon to pass the sacrament which was a pretty scary thing for me but I did it and didn't drop either of the trays with the bread and water despite my hands shaking.
The very next week I was asked to bless the sacrament. Now this was beyond scary. How was I going to memorize the prayer over the bread and water in a little under 15 minutes.(I didn't know they had printed copies of the prayer up at the table) So I sat in a chair behind the table and waited for what was quickly becoming a very scary but awesome event. The person at the table with me(I think his name was Ryan) asked me which I wanted to bless. I said I would bless the bread so I could go ahead and get it out of the way. I dropped to one knee and started to read the prayer. As I started to speak it felt like a golden pillar of light was coming down from heaven giving sanction to the ordinance I was performing. I had never felt such power and love in my life. However despite this outpouring of love and power from God I was afraid I was going to mess up what I had to say. My fear was confirmed when I looked up to see Bishop D motion for me to bless the bread again. I felt so embarrassed. What did I do wrong? So I got back down and read the prayer again with a little more apprehension this time. Once again when I was finished Bishop D motioned for me to try again a third time(apparently the prayer had to be said exactly verbatim without any changes. See how little I knew.) This time when I finished Bishop D didn't tell me to it again so we gave the bread to the guys who were passing it to the congregation. However I was still shaking both from embarrassment as well as the giant spiritual step I had just taken.
Around three or four weeks after I was baptized I received my patriarchal blessing. When I first heard about patriarchal blessing I asked the young lady who showed hers to me if a patriarch was some kind of Mormon fortune teller. She was rather apprehensive in sharing her blessing with me for I was not yet baptized and she was afraid she might be casting her pearls before swine. Even though at that point in my life I didn't believe in God or anything like that I knew that she felt that her blessing from some old Mormon gypsy was important to her so I didn't belittle it or make fun of it. It talked of her attributes she had and the ones she should develop as well as paths in life that she should take and what kind of life she could have. I still thought it was weird and asked her if the patriarch had a glass ball of some kind or if he tossed bones in the air or read cat guts to learn this stuff. She tried to explain blessing to me but I still didn't buy it.
But getting back to three or four weeks after I was baptized I had decided I wanted to visit the Mormon fortune teller and get my fortune. I bothered Bishop Donaldson until he finally interviewed me and decided that I should get my patriarchal blessing. I was really excited about going to get my blessing. Part of me wanted to know what my future had in store for me and other part of me wanted to see if this guy was for real.
Well I asked my father and step mother to come up for my blessing I also asked Bishop Donaldson to be there because I looked at him like a second father and I asked Sheena my girl friend at the time to come as well.
Well we all showed up to the patriarch's house that night and to my surprise it wasn't in some shack surrounded by goats and he wasn't a gypsy. He was a cute little old guy who had this special look to him. There was just an aura radiating about him that seemed different from anyone else that I had ever met before in my life.
After we made small talk for about five minutes he asked me if I was ready for my blessing. I responded that I was. He then had me sit in a chair that was in the middle of the room and he placed his hands upon my head.
A feeling of peace and happiness entered into my body from the top of my head and swirled down towards my feet. The patriarch then began to speak. My eyes were open at this time, I didn't know if I was supposed to close my eyes or keep them open during blessings. Everyone eyes were shut tight so I decided to shut my eyes and listen to what this old man told me. He talked about many things but one of the things was how I would serve a mission and preach the gospel. I got kind of upset at him talking about me serving a mission. I had already told President Clark that I wasn't going to serve a mission and I was going into Boot Camp May 15th of 2003. I wondered why President Clark didn't tell this old guy that there was no way no how that I was going to serve a mission. Even if I wanted to I was already committed to something else. So he continued on spending around fifteen minutes talking about me and preaching the restored gospel. I just kind of wrote that part of what he said off.
When I got into the car with my father after it was all done and you have to remember that my father isn't to favorable disposed toward Mormonism he asked me if I was going to go on that mission thing. I responded that I couldn't because I had already joined the Marine Corps. He then told me the only reason that the patriarch told me to go on a mission was because my dad wore a nice bola tie and had nice cowboy boots on.
As the next week drug on and I started to think more about what he had said about me serving a mission I decided he wasn't talking about me serving a mission as a young man but rather as a senior citizen. That the part of blessing regarding me preaching the gospel was talking about me many many years into the future.
Several times during the months preceding me entering boot camp the idea of me serving a mission crept in from many places. Bishop D mentioned it a few times. Sheena mentioned it. President Clark advised it. The misisonaries bore testimony about how great serving a mission was and many others would try to convince me serving a mission was the right thing to do. However I had stood of my own free will and volition and swore before God and witnesses that I would enter the Marine Corps and that I would defend the constitution from all enemies both foreign and domestic. I saw no wiggle room I could not serve a mission and retain my honor. I had given my word that I would do something and I wasn't about to go back on my word.
It seems at times when we are pushed towards doing something that we become as stubborn as mules but when we decide something on our own that almost nothing can dissuade us from following our new course and so it was with me.
About a week after I was baptized I decided that I needed to have the Arronic Priesthood. So I asked Bishop D what I needed to do to get it and he said come to church, be active, and worthy. "Well," I responded, "I am doing all those things, so when can I get it." So two weeks after I was baptized I received the Arronic Priesthood from Trevor Alvold.( I think his names spelled wrong there) I then had the opportunity to pass, prepare, and bless the sacrament along with the obligation to start something called Home Teaching. The Sunday after I received the Arronic Priesthood I was called upon to pass the sacrament which was a pretty scary thing for me but I did it and didn't drop either of the trays with the bread and water despite my hands shaking.
The very next week I was asked to bless the sacrament. Now this was beyond scary. How was I going to memorize the prayer over the bread and water in a little under 15 minutes.(I didn't know they had printed copies of the prayer up at the table) So I sat in a chair behind the table and waited for what was quickly becoming a very scary but awesome event. The person at the table with me(I think his name was Ryan) asked me which I wanted to bless. I said I would bless the bread so I could go ahead and get it out of the way. I dropped to one knee and started to read the prayer. As I started to speak it felt like a golden pillar of light was coming down from heaven giving sanction to the ordinance I was performing. I had never felt such power and love in my life. However despite this outpouring of love and power from God I was afraid I was going to mess up what I had to say. My fear was confirmed when I looked up to see Bishop D motion for me to bless the bread again. I felt so embarrassed. What did I do wrong? So I got back down and read the prayer again with a little more apprehension this time. Once again when I was finished Bishop D motioned for me to try again a third time(apparently the prayer had to be said exactly verbatim without any changes. See how little I knew.) This time when I finished Bishop D didn't tell me to it again so we gave the bread to the guys who were passing it to the congregation. However I was still shaking both from embarrassment as well as the giant spiritual step I had just taken.
Around three or four weeks after I was baptized I received my patriarchal blessing. When I first heard about patriarchal blessing I asked the young lady who showed hers to me if a patriarch was some kind of Mormon fortune teller. She was rather apprehensive in sharing her blessing with me for I was not yet baptized and she was afraid she might be casting her pearls before swine. Even though at that point in my life I didn't believe in God or anything like that I knew that she felt that her blessing from some old Mormon gypsy was important to her so I didn't belittle it or make fun of it. It talked of her attributes she had and the ones she should develop as well as paths in life that she should take and what kind of life she could have. I still thought it was weird and asked her if the patriarch had a glass ball of some kind or if he tossed bones in the air or read cat guts to learn this stuff. She tried to explain blessing to me but I still didn't buy it.
But getting back to three or four weeks after I was baptized I had decided I wanted to visit the Mormon fortune teller and get my fortune. I bothered Bishop Donaldson until he finally interviewed me and decided that I should get my patriarchal blessing. I was really excited about going to get my blessing. Part of me wanted to know what my future had in store for me and other part of me wanted to see if this guy was for real.
Well I asked my father and step mother to come up for my blessing I also asked Bishop Donaldson to be there because I looked at him like a second father and I asked Sheena my girl friend at the time to come as well.
Well we all showed up to the patriarch's house that night and to my surprise it wasn't in some shack surrounded by goats and he wasn't a gypsy. He was a cute little old guy who had this special look to him. There was just an aura radiating about him that seemed different from anyone else that I had ever met before in my life.
After we made small talk for about five minutes he asked me if I was ready for my blessing. I responded that I was. He then had me sit in a chair that was in the middle of the room and he placed his hands upon my head.
A feeling of peace and happiness entered into my body from the top of my head and swirled down towards my feet. The patriarch then began to speak. My eyes were open at this time, I didn't know if I was supposed to close my eyes or keep them open during blessings. Everyone eyes were shut tight so I decided to shut my eyes and listen to what this old man told me. He talked about many things but one of the things was how I would serve a mission and preach the gospel. I got kind of upset at him talking about me serving a mission. I had already told President Clark that I wasn't going to serve a mission and I was going into Boot Camp May 15th of 2003. I wondered why President Clark didn't tell this old guy that there was no way no how that I was going to serve a mission. Even if I wanted to I was already committed to something else. So he continued on spending around fifteen minutes talking about me and preaching the restored gospel. I just kind of wrote that part of what he said off.
When I got into the car with my father after it was all done and you have to remember that my father isn't to favorable disposed toward Mormonism he asked me if I was going to go on that mission thing. I responded that I couldn't because I had already joined the Marine Corps. He then told me the only reason that the patriarch told me to go on a mission was because my dad wore a nice bola tie and had nice cowboy boots on.
As the next week drug on and I started to think more about what he had said about me serving a mission I decided he wasn't talking about me serving a mission as a young man but rather as a senior citizen. That the part of blessing regarding me preaching the gospel was talking about me many many years into the future.
Several times during the months preceding me entering boot camp the idea of me serving a mission crept in from many places. Bishop D mentioned it a few times. Sheena mentioned it. President Clark advised it. The misisonaries bore testimony about how great serving a mission was and many others would try to convince me serving a mission was the right thing to do. However I had stood of my own free will and volition and swore before God and witnesses that I would enter the Marine Corps and that I would defend the constitution from all enemies both foreign and domestic. I saw no wiggle room I could not serve a mission and retain my honor. I had given my word that I would do something and I wasn't about to go back on my word.
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